The ugly seed
Reaching upward
About to break
The top soil
Roots extending
Downward looking
Osmosis flow
Dirty mineral wealth
The sky has light
Ethereal
Quantum food source
Clean energy
But 'till the leaves
Break from the ground
The earth was made
As life support
4 comments:
I like it/get it... up 'til the last line. Help me out here.
I agree. The last line doesn't convey what I want it too, which isn't supposed to be negative in respect to the actual soil.
I've reworked the final two stanzas and took out the "rocky soil" line. I still think it lacks bite, but at least the analogy is working out. I'll continue to tweak it.
1. This is a commentary on "is-ness:" note the directional movement stanza by stanza: a: upward (poised to break through); b: downward (more deeply into dirt/resources/context); c)upward (into all that's gloriously ahead); d) at this moment, the "is-ness" lives in the dynamic tension of anticipation of above/future, while well "supported" in the dirt of here/now. All's right with the world.
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